Proverbs 23:28
She also lieth in wait as for a prey, and increaseth the transgressors among men.
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Whores and adulteresses are dangerous for two chief reasons. First, they hide their desires and schemes to seduce and entrap men, so that even noble souls are at risk (Pr 6:26; Gen 39:7-12). Second, their uninhibited desire for sexual sins is an overpowering temptation to men (Pr 7:9-18; Gen 38:14-19). King Solomon, a wise father, warned his son by this proverb to stay away from whores and strange women (Pr 23:26-28).
He had told his son that whores and adulteresses were very destructive (Pr 23:27). He compared them to falling into a deep ditch or narrow pit, a method used in those days to capture or kill difficult prey. As men covered deep ditches or narrow pits to have unsuspecting beasts fall into them and be unable to escape, so whorish women and wicked wives would capture and destroy the foolish men who crawled into their beds.
The first danger is that evil women hide their desires and schemes from open view (Pr 5:6). The poor prince discovers too late that the deep respect, eager service, listening ear, adoring eyes, flattering praise, and impeccable appearance were merely means to seduce and entrap the next king. Solomon knew this creature so well that he said she was more bitter than death (Eccl 7:26). He sought here to save his son and you from her wiles.
The most dangerous women are not filthy sluts walking ghetto streets, skimpily dressed women at nightclubs, or drunken coeds on spring break. They hardly hide or wait at all. Most know their desires and plans. Most know the results of sinning with them. Most know to avoid the places where they gather. The most dangerous women are those that appear noble and virtuous in ordinary situations, but are hiding secret desires and plans to seduce. Only a few perceive their intentions; only a few can resist their wiles.
Whores and strange women lurk everywhere, especially today. The whore from Pr 23:27 could be an unmarried woman that engages in casual sex, or fornication. The strange woman is often a wife that cheats on her husband, committing adultery. Solomon called her a strange woman, because she is an alien, foreigner, or outsider to any man but her own husband. These are two kinds of women in the world of which men must beware.
Wicked women know they can attract men easily, and they use the power of their looks, words, eyes, and kisses for evil (Pr 5:3; 6:25; 7:13). Samson could not be taken by any other means, no matter how many or how well-armed the Philistines were approaching him. But one lying woman quickly reduced him to putty, and his strength and life were gone. He could not resist her. She was too much for him. Solomon warned that such women had destroyed many strong men – Samson being a horrible example (Pr 7:26).
The second danger is that evil women make it easier for men to fall to the lusts of their eyes and flesh. Men could not commit fornication or adultery, if women would not. Easy women create opportunity for the powerful male sex drive to lead men into sexual sins, which requires both parties. If women were faithful to their greater inhibitions, men would be hindered and helped from sinning. But when they are not, sexual sins increase. The guilt is equal; both are to be punished; but Solomon’s words were for his son.
Female inhibitions are important. They must be cultivated and protected (Titus 2:3-5). Without them, women increase sexual sins in the world. An inhibition is an internal restraint of conscience or instinct that hinders or limits a person’s thoughts, words, or actions. Female inhibitions are those internal restraints that keep women from uncovering themselves, being alone with other men, allowing intimate words or contact, etc.
This generation brainwashes girls to remove their inhibitions and to be sexually bold and promiscuous. This is done by television, sensual teen rock stars, coed swimming in next to nothing, sensual music, coed colleges, peer pressure, movies exalting fornication, dancing, popularity of immoral actresses, artists, and athletes, amoral education, lack of dress codes, coed middle and high schools, the end of formal courting or chaperoned dating, private communication via text messages, cell phones, emails, chatrooms, etc.
Female inhibitions are important. Pornography is a sin for men, but it can only occur with a sin by women. If women had not boldly stripped themselves in front of cameras, there would be no erotic nudity or sexual acts to enflame the lusts of the eyes and flesh of men, who may range from the accidental viewer to the curious to the addicted. Pornographic models may rely on drugs to do what they do in front of the camera, or they have had their inhibitions completely destroyed by a variety of the means suggested above.
Every father must keep his daughter’s inhibitions strong and sensuality in reserve for her husband. She must be fully covered at home and in public, so she has a strong resistance to exposing herself. Conversation should not excite ungodly sexual curiosity. She should always be chaperoned with the opposite sex, so that evil familiarity or wicked situations do not arise. This list could be extended. It is the duty of every father (and mother) to promote and protect his daughter’s precious inhibitions for her sake and society’s safety.
Every husband must keep his wife’s inhibitions strong and sensuality reserved for himself. How? By requiring appropriate versions of the rules for daughters above. The only role a wife has is a loving wife – nothing else! Guard her inputs as well, lest worldly ideas of casual sex tempt her mind or flesh. She should reject situations where she would be alone with another man. Do not take her anywhere, even as husband and wife, which would promote a carnal spirit. Watching lascivious movies together is sin for both!
Libertarians speak of victimless crimes, and they include prostitution. They would legalize this sin. But God’s word is final in all matters. He has ruled, “Do not prostitute thy daughter, to cause her to be a whore; lest the land fall to whoredom, and the land become full of wickedness” (Lev 19:29). Prostitution is a sin, even if every act of such is consensual by two adults. God said so! Prostitution destroys the moral character of a nation. Read it! Even one prostitute can lead to widespread wickedness by many men.
Wife, loss of inhibitions or discontentment with your husband is a first step to adultery. If you fantasize about more exciting lovemaking, your sinful heart will seek it out (Jas 1:14-15). Worldly inputs must be removed, so the thought of adultery is repulsive to you. There is no more room for carnal romance novels in your life than there is for pornographic magazines in his. Both create discontentment and enflame forbidden lusts.
Young man, avoid worldly girls and never be alone with any girl. If you think such rules are too binding, you have not wisely considered the consequences of sexual sin, for the minor restraint now is far better than death and hell later (Pr 7:27). Solomon well described the anguish of the man taken down by a whore or strange woman (Pr 5:7-14).
Son, make no provision to fulfill your flesh’s lusts (Rom 13:14; II Tim 2:22). The easiest way to avoid this enemy is to avoid her! Stay far from any place or person that even looks or acts like a whore or adulteress (Pr 4:14-15; 5:8; 7:8). Reject any inputs that feed the lusts of the eyes or flesh, such as carnal music, movies, magazines, or friends. Instead, read the Bible and pray every day. Keep company with godly young men like Joseph.
David slew Goliath, but he could not resist Bathsheba, and Bathsheba did not resist him like Abigail had resisted him earlier in his life in another matter (II Sam 11:1-5; I Sam 25:1-44). The consequences were terrible, immediate and long-term. Judah was a self-righteous zealot (Gen 37:26-27; 38:24), but he could not resist the offer of sexual intimacy from his disguised daughter-in-law (Gen 38:14-19). These two men were guilty of adultery, but the willing or conniving women created the opportunity or event.
But, but, Joseph withstood Mrs. Potiphar and all her attempts to seduce and pressure him into her bed (Gen 39:7-12). What a prince! What a mighty man! Joseph was greater in strength than both Samson and David in a test harder than fighting Philistines. Reader, will you prepare yourself, pray for yourself, and conduct yourself as Joseph? Though evil women increase the transgressors among men, virtuous men can resist and defeat them.
Is there a spiritual application? Indeed. Every man should find and join the pure bride of Christ, the chaste virgin of a true New Testament church (II Cor 11:2; Eph 5:25-27). For there is a whore church with harlot daughter churches that seduce men craftily and patiently into their lying bosoms (Rev 17:1-6; 18:3; 19:2; Jas 4:4). They lie in wait as for prey, and they increase the religious and spiritual transgressors among men (II Pet 2:1-3).